I lived till(:

Saturday, June 18, 2005
there's a party coming up next week. i cant wait. going to be a big thing, with stupid guys. ( okay lah, not stupid, later hurt my boos feelings. )

i'm suppose to invite 14 people. god! i guess i'll be helping out with the music, after all i've got my new pink ipod mini. i know my dad bought pink so that he can irritate me and try to make me into one of the PiNkIEx fans.

4:55 PM

You know how your mother, father, pastor would say how demonic Marilyn Manson is, or how Rock music and Heavy metal should not be listened. Well, you can tell them to fuck themselves, why? How can an individual be considered as demonic, just because he or her preference of music is totally different from yours. The person who should be considered as a demonic bad example should be the person who judges others. The news is demonic, the news is bad luck, the news tells you what’s bad and what’s good, the news judges you, the news tells you that terrorists attacked New York yesterday, the news tells you that your president died, the news tells you bad news and barely focuses on the good.

Different people have different value systems, just because someone loves classical music and the other loves punk/rock/heavy metal. That doesn’t give you the rights to look down on the punker/rocker/heavy metaler. Just because you believe in a strong relationship and, the other, sleeps around, that doesn’t mean that the one who sleeps around is in wrong. Yes, the straits times judges people, and make you think that you sleeping around, is wrong. To different people, it is wrong, but maybe to the person, it doesn’t matter. And then the straits times would try to turn everyone and everything against you, when actually they are the ones who should get shot. And when you do something just for yourself and for the ones you love, they twist everything around and make you seem like you’ve regretted and that you know that you are in wrong. and they would try to twist everything and anything around to make you look bad, esp when you don’t give two hoots on what they say. Be yourself, don’t give a shit on what you’re being labeled as, even though the media can be really harsh. And when the going gets tough, you will get tougher. You know how people write on their friendster account that they hate hypocrites, well wake up, everyone is a hypocrite. You hate people to judge you, but yet you judge others. You hate flirts, isn’t that already judging. But that isn’t the point, the point is that, you should not give two hoots on what others think.

This is just like the school I’m in. Teachers and the principal makes everyone seem lesbian and makes lesbians seem wrong. They judge everyone, even if you’re not lesbian, you will still be judged as a lesbian when you hug your friend. Well I guess the school is just too lost, and too busy judging, criticizing, trying to CORRECT ones value system, when actually they need some fixing.

Everyone and everything is being judged now, you’ve to be careful on what you do or say. And no matter how true we want to be to ourselves, we might just give in to society and turn into one of those judgmental bustards. How I wish I could make everyone un-judgmental.

And to people who say i should not be proud of my own flesh and blood, and that i should not follow in her foot steps, well i am not following in her foot steps, she is just making me an even more open minded person ( and of course clever lah ) and i'm god damn proud of her, because she is my sister. I will never be ashamed of someone whom i love so dearly.

2:19 PM

today, is just like any other insignificant day. my brother is squashing the mogu piggy on my head, it's so funny. slept at 4am, was talking on the phone with phoebe and marissie.
woke up at 12, god. marisse called me, to tell me to get my butt off my bed.
got lost while walking to serangoon interchange macs. got some bagel thing with marisse, then went to meet phobe at the interchange. took a bus to hougang gym thingy. jogged, took a shower, looked stupid, i dont like sports shoes lah. saw a dog, chained to a tree, poor baby. phoebe managed to touch it and stuff, i didnt dare lah, and marisse touched it too.
took the train to orchard, saw theresa! except didnt know it was her, we were both exchanging stares. and then later i told marisse " eh the long hair girl staring at you , you know !" but actually, she was looking at me , and she was theresa.
oh yes met qian shi ( i suck at spelling names lah! ). someone took her slippers as well as marisse. hehehe. window shopped, qian shi met her sister. i saw this jumper skirt thingy at mango, which i really like, except it costs 90. i will get it once i've got the cash.
qian shi sister left. Marisse, Qian Shi, Phoebe and i then went to macs to eat. met birdy. sometimes, she acts like a kid, which is totally adorable. she bit my burger, and the sauce started leaking out, her whole mouth had sauce that i had to clean it off using a napkin for her. i feel so motherly for once. and she wore some tight shit shirt, wah lao, faggot until cannot faggot anymore lah. anyway, qian shi and phoebe went home. whereas, marisse and i went for the concert, school of rock or rock on singapore or something like that. alicia, celeste and elaine met us there. they didnt really enjoy it. so they left half way.
marisse and i had lots of fun though. I WENT ON STAGE! hahahha, YES I DID! and i did a HEAD BANG thing, or rather i competed with someone who was probably 19 yrs of age. Annabelle frances ( is that her name? ) was quite shocked when she saw me, quote " HOW OLD ARE YOU! " i really looked young huh.
anyway, the other girl won, even though I SWEAR, my crowd cheer was much louder. she only moved her head, i moved my whole body. even though i knew i was off beat and i looked like i was having fits. and as you know, alicia's voice is equal to twice the loudness of 3 people screaming. so anyway, got a free bag, which got stolen by some uncle anyway.
danced with marisse, she's a good dancer, and now i didnt really dance. we left after the second last band, jazz and stuff was good though.
i left with her at around 10.30pm. then took a train home. we stank.
walked home. reached home, received the radio academy thing, i managed to hear myself on radio. gross like nothing else.

i was taking a look at the 2005 butch hunt, frankly speaking, most are quite old and not so goodlooking, AND I'M HELL SURE THERE ARE BETTER LOOKING BUTCHES OUT THERE! and then i compared 2005 and 2003 butches, 2003 had more goodlooking butches, more mixed blood, MUCH YOUNGER TOO. most were 19+. anyway, i want to go for the butch hunt, but maybe too young, right toad?

JILL, YOU NEED ANGER MANAGEMENT, squeeze your nehneh. =D heeheehee.

i've just received word, party 22nd june,( this coming wed ) charis' party ( have not thought for a name yet ) fifteen dollars, DONT ASK ME HOW THEY FOUND THE CHALET! and i'm allowed to invited AMPAP ( as many people as possible ). kimbirdee also asked me to do that. hahaha. =D
it falls on hannahs birthday i just realised.

1:42 AM

I lived till(:

Friday, June 17, 2005
While talking about tannys chinese name , the same thing occurs again.

Born without Undies ( her ):
and like Tanny is sorta of a guy name too''

Voraciously Vikki-baba: Tanny jr the porcupine. ( me ) :
thats why you are so gay

Born without Undies:
i love gays, they dont pose any threats

same thing, i really think she'd get beaten up by homosexual man next time.

1:31 AM

I lived till(:

Thursday, June 16, 2005
everytime mom and sis talks, they would end up with a "dont judge me, but you are hurting your family members" debate.

ho hums.
slept at 4am, believe it or not, i talked to marisse since 1am! yeah we talked for three hours plus. well okay we put down the phone at around 4.15am. and half way through, i went to cook eggs. i scrambbled 3 eggs! with rice. i was really hungry, after reading claymarble. hahaha. i cant wait for one tree hill later!
anyway, woke up at 12pm, then went out with mom at 1. tanny saw me, and tried shouting my name, but as you know, tanny cannot shout for nuts. so yeah, i did not hear her. went for BATMAN BEGINS, which began at 1.30. and ended at 4. then mom bought MORE TICKETS to ice princess or princess ice or something like that, the most sissiest movie i've watched. met miles inbetween the 20min of waiting. he was with a girl, tiffany, so okay maybe he ain't queer.
Went for the movie, i think it sends out a good message, "persue your dream". the girl who loves ice skating and who is also a physic geek had a choice on whether to get her scholarship or become this ice skater in competitions. and so she choses to be a ice skater, her mom was dead angry, and yes mothers do play a huge role in ones life, and so she barely talked to her mom, and was pretty hurt. and stuff. but when her mom went for the FINALS, she skated like, wow. ( and if you watch the movie, it was really like, WOW. )

you know how, most of the movies sends out the same message, it is usually follow your heart not your head, or follow your dreams or be yourself. but in actual fact, no one has actually put those statements in reality. and those who actually want to be themselves, get crushed or get on the news as pedophiles ( Michael jackson. ). and then there are those who want to follow their dreams, but yet their moms wouldnt allow that. because what they want to go for, aint a stable job or something like that. And then there's the follow your heart not your head. -_- no one wants to hire someone stupid with a big heart. PFFT.

11:41 PM

i think my mom was really fascinated by them. hahaha. moms thoughts " wow, i want to have such cool, short and funkaye hair. " HAHAHA.  Posted by Hello

12:39 AM

SMILEEEE. lizard you're not smiling. Posted by Hello

12:37 AM

HAHAHA. what a fun shot. Posted by Hello

12:35 AM

everyone looks nice here. Posted by Hello

12:33 AM

xiang na. hahaha. =D  Posted by Hello

12:31 AM

TANNY, PLEASE, SO INDICENT! tsk. hannah looks quite nice Posted by Hello

12:28 AM

what you looking at ! Posted by Hello

12:26 AM

so much shadow. focous on the paintings Posted by Hello

12:25 AM

shaun sisters friend. Posted by Hello

12:24 AM

without a bra. and more mirrors. Posted by Hello

12:23 AM

my room is filled with mirrors! giant mirrors infact. Posted by Hello

12:22 AM

quote what mom said " are you sure or not? you better check whether they make your nose look twice the size " WOMAN! Posted by Hello

12:21 AM

awwww. hi there pretty one. Posted by Hello

12:20 AM

MY NEW BESTFRIENDS! more mirrors! believe it or not, they only costs 8 bucks!!!! i bet it costs 100 bucks in singapore. my sister got them from another country, they're pretty. Posted by Hello

12:20 AM

one more shot. i like the shiny apple! =) and the beads. mom asked me to throw them away, she claims that it's only for buddah. Posted by Hello

12:19 AM

yahlah, there you go the idiot cap. thank you zoe and rest. too many to name Posted by Hello

12:18 AM

the cute thing rachie gave to me. Posted by Hello

12:17 AM

all my presents! the giant converse shoes which can even fit me. -_- Posted by Hello

12:17 AM

full length picture of tanny jr. isnt she adorable. tanny ( her biological dad/mom claims that she is a HE. stupid woman/man. ) Posted by Hello

12:16 AM


12:15 AM

the fat italian man which looks like my dad. =D Posted by Hello

12:14 AM

I lived till(:

Wednesday, June 15, 2005
Born without Undies ( toad )says:
youre so inlove with me that i am on your nick :D

Born without Undies says:
smell my cock

Born without Undies says:

Voraciously Vikki-baba: Tanny jr the porcupine. ( Me )says:
no im inlove with tanny junior stupid

Born without Undies says:
oops i dont have one.

tanny, everyday you say the same thing, everyday you think you're male, please face the music and accept the fact that you do not have a dick !

11:29 PM

Marisse came over to my place at around 530. she's so funny sometimes. i love marissie. she's adorable, she's like my human size carebear. dont you think so?

Anyway, left my place at around 830. somehow, i do like small families. i like having the whole house to marivik, mom and myself. it's just so much quieter. So anyway, went to grapevine. met alicia. a ex PL lite, sharlene or some name ( i'm not too good with names ) is now a waitress there. the last time i saw her, besides today, was with her girl, and they were customers, i wonder how she got the job. yeah, anyway, ate nuggets, salad and oreo frap. surprisingly, no one played pool. at around 915, took the bus to alicia's house. once we alighted from the bus, MY MOTHER CALLED, and she sounded really angry, so marisse and i took a cab back home. -_- huge sweat drop.
so got home, AND REALISED SHE AINT ANGRY, or she's barely angry. watched eye for a guy or rather i'd eye for denise keller. howard, mr romantic was not chosen, instead mr perfect, wolfgang got chosen. it was so sweet. :( poor howwie.

Tanny the cheerleader. HAHAHAHA. i love that. i'm bored, should i go disturb marissie? or entertain myself with queer as folk? puffggg. marisse is so lazy smetimes.

11:05 PM

Got my butt out of bed at 10.15am, don’t ask me how. Ate brunch. Which was Marivik’s pasta. Then left my place at 1045am. It was raining, god was it lovely, I really wanted to sleep. I was really engrossed in clay marble, it’s probably one of the nicest literature books I’ve ever read, or at least the best out of the two lit books I’ve read ( which is animal farm and this lah. ) Anyway, went to Pinnacel Dental. After doing my teeth, which is still black braces went to POLAR to eat sardine puff. I’ve only got 2 dollars and 50 cents with me at the time. So I bought a puff, sat down and eat. Still reading clay marble and also waiting for marisse’s long awaited call. God damn woman, was still in bed at 12.20 pm! Like, I don’t even sleep that long, but I’m sure many of YOU do. Like slugs, keep sleeping, keep drooling, keep sliming, so annoying, just like bird.
Out of point, anyway marisse called at around 12.45 and said I couldn’t go to her place. -_- huge sweat drop. It was fine actually, I was fine actually since I had a story book, or else I would’ve killed her. Took the train back home. Missed my train stop ( was really glued to clay marble, beautiful story ), and ended up at kovan, couldn’t get my butt to move, so sat the train to puggol then back to serangoon. Got home, read the papers, ate apple, vic came over to collect his MP3. I’ve to do my newspaper article now, on Michael Jackson, hehehe, birddehs news name, Michael Jackson. So everyone, CALL HER MIKEYYY!!!!!! =P! my dad just messaged me from China, asking me how much an ipod is. I TOLD YOU KRIS! He would either buy it for me on the day itself or on another day. Well that’s cause I never do ask him for anything. The last time I asked him for something was probably shoes. But shoes were only 10 bucks in china, so he might as well buy. He’s so nice.
=D and yes I’m daddy’s little angel. :)

3:06 PM

marisse, eunice and i are talking online. talk about crude nick names. it's so painfully funny

CHILLS DOWN MY SPINE fuck ya eunice yer a fuckin fucker i wont fuck you the image of you is so morbid. (marisse)

bad boy; its pandemonium FUCK OFF MARISSE. I DONT WANT MARISSE TO FUCK ME. ( yogi bearo )


WOW. DAMN CRUDE. hahahahha. i laughed like mad when i saw the two idiots nicknames.


12:35 AM

I lived till(:

Tuesday, June 14, 2005
bird made me laugh like mad just now. infront of my computer screen.

dreg, the butch i met at midnight affair messaged me. and then there was another girl my bunch of friends met, gough, pronunced something like goth. real cool names if you ask me. and when they ask for birddehs name, she's like " elizabeth " so yeah bird wants a macho name ( though she isnt macho ).
first name : MICHAEL JACKSON.
WTF NAME....!?!?! HAHAHA even got sur name. super funny. i couldn't stop laughing.

11:37 PM


TARRRRNNY AHHH. hahaha. this is what you get if you're as narcissistic as tanny.

quote from drakes blog " Only the stupid Birthday girl kept diving into the pool , with her undies and bra on, man, water pollution. "

FIRSTLY, i did not dive into the pool, i was either pushed or pulled into the pool on purpose. i know that, tanny on the other hand really wanted to go skinny dipping, but too shy to show off her breasts and cunt, yet she calls herself macho. TSK!

another quote " Should have complaint to her indian boyfriend aka security guard. "

from drakes blog.
NO he is not my boyfriend, infact i was so pissed at that fat bastard for not helping with the radio thing. but i know tanny is secretly inlove with him. ( though i'm pretty sure half of the island already knows she has a huge crush on him )
so dont trust tanny with a secret, esp since she cant even keep her own.

another quote " She couldnt get enough of being wet, so we pushed that ass in like 20times. "

drakes blog.
I DID NOT WANT TO GET IN THE WATER ! The " couldnt get enough " part is totally untrue.

another quote " So much so that my mom text: "Dont play near the pool all crazy" "

ripped from drakes blog.
no it isnt "all crazy". To be more specific, tanny is crazy.

another quote " And besides, that asshead's house stinks so much, "

from drakes blog once again. and tanny was the one who stank it !

WOW TANNY, YOU REALLY SHOULD GET YOUR FACTS RIGHT. i'm soo nice to help you correct everything.

10:24 PM

12 june :
Born without Undies ( Toad )says:
are they gays?

Born without Undies says:
I love gays

Born without Undies says:
i love gays, they dont pose threats

Voraciously Vikki-baba: I AM STILL YOUNG ( me ):
I'll laugh if someday some faggot beats you up.

Today :
Born without Undies says:
suck my cock

Born without Undies says:
oops, i dont have one

tsk, tanny so naughty. purrrvertic toad.

10:05 PM

i dont like xiaxue, i dont know why people are so engrossed into her blog. It's not as though what she types makes any sense what so ever. Frankly speaking, i've seen better writers. she seems like a typical PiNkIeXx fan, dont you think?

and no i do not read her blog, someone gave me her link earlier on today. She sounds like one jealous prick.

quote " I've been quiet till now, and I cannot stand it anymore. The men all around me and all moaning about how hot she is, and her wonderful her body is. Machiam Jolin season all over again. "
from xiaxue's blog.

what does it spell to me? it spells a big huge fat green word, JEALOUSY.

woke up at 11.30. had piano at 12.30. slacked around the house. i feel like one big bummer. i better start to treasure my hols. believe it or not, I'VE NOT BEEN GOING OUT! whoo. i miss my sister. anyway, marisse's mom smsed me. talk about being vulgar and she thought i was phoebe/ siew hwee/ cai shan. damn funny lah, i'm like none of the above. oh well. watched 2 episodes of queer as folk. once again, very touching. =O BRAIN IS LIKE IMPROVING HIS ASSHOLICNESS. hahaha. so anyway, had tuition. now sitting her blogging lo.

9:50 PM

literature poem :

Hello there my friend
it has been ages since we've talked
your hair pin is still on my table
and i've not forgot

hello there my friend
remember the first time we talked?
when you were in diapers
and i sucked the bottle alot

Hello there my friend
i remember the first time you walked
you took the first step toward me
and then stumbled down and fall

Hello there my friend
You always played in my house
climbing on the double decker
which is broken now, anyhow.

Hello there my friend
i remember the first day of school
we were in different classes
and i was so scared without you

Hello there my friend
we have not talked till now
you are in australia
while i'm still here

Child hood friends we are
but i bet you've forgot
i will too, today
as it's time to throw your pin away.

i think it isn't the best i've written, i want to write another one. hiakhiak.
i guess, it's sorta dedicated to nerzz. =D

4:31 PM

i think i caught a cold. i'm so cold now. and i feel super broke. i feel that there's alot of people who owe me money. cab fare esp.
Marisse is so funny sometimes. i'm starving, believe it or not i did not eat much during the BBQ, i was busy swimming in the pool collecting my sandals.

1:32 AM

i feel so bad, birds phone is spoilt. =X argh.

today :
woke up at 11, i've no idea how i got my ass out, but anway, i did.
Went to plaza sing to do some grocerry shopping with my maid. bumped into miles, no he wasn't wearing his pink shirt, booooo..
met vikthor, bought the stuff for the BBQ. then cabbed home. slacked around for a while. ner came over at around 4. i was so sleepy ! oh well.
but anyway she talked like a machine gun, NONSTOP, about her camp and about ruth ( the hottie. ) .
sijia and amanda came soon after. then slowly people started pouring in.

in total :
Marisse, Siewhwee, Lizard, Tanny, Alicia, Bird, Rachel, Amanda, Sijia, Celeste, Zoe, Charis, Nerizza, Vikthor, Denise, Charissa, Charissa's boyfriend, Hannah, Ann Na, Xiang Na and some of vikthor friends came.
charissa left so early with her boyfriend lah. Booo. never mind. Zoe was so kind, she gave me a hat which says " I'm An Idiot " on it. only an idiot would wear that, so if you see me wearing it, i'm probably force to wear it.
Anyway, a bunch of stupid people wanted to play catching. No one wanted to play with Zoe since she ran so fast. Hiakhiak.
then more stupid people went to play hide and seek.
oh yes and i got pushed into the pool by dunno who, so annoying! then they threw my sandals in the pool! they made my their entertainment monkey. it was so funny since some people who wants to buy a house in the condo went to take a look at the pool, AND MY SANDALS WERE INSIDE WITH ME. so funny lah, and they kinda like quickly walked off.
Anyway, dunked sijia, Bird, Rachel, Charis and Zoe in the pool. REALLY really wanted to dunk tanny in, esp since she can go home to change. but no, her mom said " avoid the pool, crazy people. " or something like that. SO FUNNY LAH. and her mom was peeping through the windows or something.
=O ! should shout HI AUNTAYE.
anyway, after doing stupid stuff, and getting dunked into the pool like 10 time. water kept going into my nose, yes that was how painful it was. rachel whacked me, so many times. =O OUCH.
well the begining of the party was actually pretty boring, esp since the fuck fat indian guard wouldnt want to help us with the switch and all. SO ANNOYING LAH. i was super pissed, esp since i pay like 200 dollars every month for the pool and facilities, WHEN THE FACILITIES CANT EVEN WORK.
fat guard doesnt want to do anything, sheesh.
yeah so it was pretty boring not just because of that but because everyone was forming their own cliques.
like marisse with siewhwee, ner and charis kept singing nonstop ( no need of radio anymore ), lizard and tanny. but it was much better soon, after i got dunked and when alicia arrived.
i walked up and down my house like probably 20 times today, talk about losing weight. -_- everyone wanted me to participate in catching when i was so tired!
too bad yogi bearo ( eunice ) couldnt come, as well as nerissa and theresa.
anyway, watched desperate housewives, or rather watched half way. alicia, lizard, bird, tanny and i went to watch L word. but tanny left damn early. -_- it's kinda weird since she lives in the same condo, yet it's really touching since she wants to company her lonely mom at home. that's the problem with being a single child. and lonely mothers.
alot of people left.
oh yes and i didnt cut the cake during the BBQ instead i cut it at 11.30pm i think. only alicia, lizard, celeste, marisse, Xiang Na and Ann Na sung me a birthday song. why didnt a cut it earlier? because i didnt want to have a cake smashed face.
yeah. Anyway, lizard, Celeste and Alicia left together. marisse, xiang na and an na stayed slightly longer then left at around 12.30.
so now i'm alone. hiakhiak. =D quite a fun party after all. i thought it was going to be sucha bore, since the starting was sucha bore. but it turned out pretty fine actually. =D
hahahaha, and there wasn't alcohol, because we are good girls.
by the way, there were guys, except we didnt talk to them. HIAKHIAK, tanny i know you love the guy who said vikthor so girliely.
-_- bullying gay men.
anyway. G'NIGHTS.

12:47 AM

I lived till(:

Sunday, June 12, 2005
It's my birthday and i'm alone at home with marivik. and my parents say i cant go out. i'm so pissed cause i cant meet zoe lin the hippo. and i cant even go out. i guess they want me to cut the fucking cake by today. i'm going to go mope around the house and wander how i'm suppose to celebrate my birthday tomorrow.

birthdays, they suck sometimes, esp if you're broke, with a wanting to book a chalet and not allowed out of the house.
i want to die, i'm so old.

to all the people who reminded me that i'm forty, thank you very much.
lets just list down the people :
bird, alicia, marisse, zoe, vikthor, charis ( i love you booboo! ), hannah, kristle, rachel, Eunice, Shannon, Sijia, Frederick( happy birthday to you too), HuiJuan, Kimbirdee, Candice hohoho, Tanny, Nerissa, Nerizza, Liankim, Tall Bu ( Shi yun ), Ann Na, Theresa, Aunty Anne.
i think that's it, sorry if i left your name out but thanks. there are probably more, those who said happy birthday in advance and all.

my sister invited me to some party. hiakhiak.

5:29 PM