I lived till(:

Saturday, July 22, 2006
My damn cool friend.

Just an hour ago I was in the bus holding on to her hand. It was just perfect, me by her side. As she stroked my hand with her slender fingers, I couldn't help but love her even more. She made me feel so comfortable as we threw nasty comments to those "idols" on tv mobile.
We said our goodbyes with a peck on the lips, she is perfect and fucking cute.

So I spent my evening with my girl at army market. The walk from Bugis mrt to there was extremely tiring.
Sadly, there was no more char kuay tiao for us :(:(
So I just got myself a plate of hor fun which looked very weird and She got herself a plate of duck rice.
Seriously, ducks should not have so many bones especially since they know they're being bred for their meat.
Got myself a pair of shorts, bought N something, got a pair of plain slip ons too.
Took a bus home.
That's all folks.

Here's what my brother said to me.

Voraciously Vicky is reading HOLES. says:
Justin. says:
Justin. says:
wtf are you talking abt
Justin. says:
gay shit
Justin. says:
ass whore
Justin. says:
bitch face
Justin. says:
man shit
Justin. says:
cunt clit
Justin. says:
fuck nuts
Justin. says:
dick lips
Justin. says:
ball bitch
Justin. says:
ass wipe
Justin. says:
Justin. says:
vulgarities galore
Justin. says:
woo hoo
Voraciously Vicky is reading HOLES. says:
what ass clit

Thank you.

9:28 PM

I lived till(:

Friday, July 21, 2006
Ignore the previous post.
Which I myself have deleted.
Anyway, school was tiring today and I was literally stonning througout the Math lesson.
Nothing processed through my brain, and hopefully I will pass the test.
After school went for Drama.
Oh yes by the way, today is the last day for our class' littleboy elective geography teacher, he's a nice guy I've to admit.
I won't be surprise if he is bisexual or gay. ( but u know, that's just me and my gaydar ain't that great. )

Yesterday my sister messaged me, and tmrw I'm gonna model for the exhibition for some gay pride indignation if I'm not wrong.
The theme is "sama sama " Which means same same.
Akira will be joining me along with his tattoos, metal studs and extreme mohawk.
No I'm not gonna be modelling as a lesbian but a high school girl.
I'm suppose to be the good girl and he's suppose to be the rebel.
It's like Ying and Yang.
The message which Sam, the Photographer is trying to get across is that, even if you're a big shot in some company or a untouchable, you're still shit and we're all shit.
Basically we're all shit and the same.
I really like his work by the way.
His India pictures are very cool.

9:38 PM

I lived till(:

Thursday, July 20, 2006
After a long time, I’ve finally got my ass down to Su su’s blog.
Her blog is seriously diabetic, the words and the photos.
I find it really sweet when I see blogs like this, with the photos and the sweet mushy words. Sadly or gladly, that has never happened to me before because I think it’s extremely lame.
Unless I’m extremely inlove. Only when I’m extremely inlove is when I’m able to do such ‘lame’ things and say that it is sweet.
But other than that, couples having such pictures look really cute and sweet.
Cherish the moment while it lasts, mmm.

Well well, I did not go to school today because the important subjects were only English, chemistry and art.
Firstly, my art is not done, so no point in going.
My chemistry teacher is on child care leave.
But there’s an argumentative essay today, which I’ve already prepared for, so I’ll probably take it next week.
Other than that, the other lessons were all lame.
Spent my day painting very little, trying to use photoshop on my layout which turned out like crap, tsk!
I had a really weird dream last night, I can only remember parts of it, but it was fantastic.
Something about pirates and my friends.
It’s true that people who sleep often doesn’t want to face reality.

Ann’s toy sheep is smiling at me :)

7:12 PM

Today, I had school, it was the same.
Boring, fun and tiring.
I managed to get the ball outta my stud.
I met C, Al, Hannah, Hannah's bf and Ner and we watched Pirates of the Carribean 2.
It was fucking amazing, and when Will Turner had to get slashed by the whip, I had to control my mouth from salivating. His back was so clean, muscular and irresitable, I want to lick ice cream off him.
BUT! Johnny Depp is still number one.
Kiera Knightley (?) was as fucking hot and dangerous as always.
This time, the movie was extremely funny and there were scenes where they just seem like hamsters running in the wheel.
Johnny Depp is not the typical prince charming kinda boy, there's just something so dangerous and mysterious about him ( not just in the movie ) that sorta captivates me.
The way he speaks and his accent melts me.
He looks like a druggie and he was and probably still is a druggie.
Johnny Depp is love ( It's true Drapes! )
After the movie I went home with Hannah and her Bf.
Happy birthday Right Boob.
:) You're wonderful and no one can replace you.

Oh and about the Crush or Like or Love thing, well that was just me being an attention seeker or may be it was just me. But whatever it is, it has passed and I don't plan to work on anything because there isn't anything to start off.
I was reading through a blog just now, and suddenly I started to feel this surge of jealousy when I read about people calling each other best friends.
I really hope it isn't jealousy, may be it's just cause I can't really understand why the blogger is using such words. When superficiality (?) is something he is not. ( Yeah guy. )

I want to blog about so many things. And usually, these are the things that trouble me the most.
I don't see why someone says that she/he is open minded when she/he still judges other people. I cannot stand people backstabbing other people, telling me other people's secrets when that person does not even concern me. ( Example some girl from the same english class as me, or even a friends friend. )
And when I keep quiet is cause I have no comments and that I don't give a shit.
I feel rather frustrated now and tend not to talk about that person even though I have the vibe that, that person has talked behind my back before. ( Oh no, I shouldn't say such a thing. And I'm not being sarcastic. But you know, vibezzzz. Uh.)
I'm not a saint, and neither are you. So who are you to judge?
Stop judging me.

-I've always wanted to say that for a very long time, once again, if you think that person is you, or who and who, just keep it to yourself. And dont be some loud hailer.
What a friends for when they've an extra mouth which vomits out all your secrets?

Once again, Happy birthday Rightie. I love you more than you can ever imagine and even though we haven't been spending time with each other. But I know that when we start talking, we'll never ever stop.

I'm tired and a little upset, I want my hot girl friend to come to my rescue.
:) I'm baby sitting my girlfriend's step son/daughter, Fat Head.

I remembered once Vic and I were talking, a really long time ago.
He said flatly that each of us, no matter how different we try to be we can't be.
We will still be classified under something, be it, anti social, emo-gay-boy, nerd or whatever.
It is true, and it's due to influence.
But when I think of not different but rather be who he/she wants to be, only one name comes to mind.
Yeah sure we'll say that we're different. But just because we aren't as superficial as typical Mgs bimbos does not make us any different from another girl who ain't superficial as typical MGS bimbos does it.
Influence, cannot be classified under good or bad.
Because all influences are bad.
Here's a quote from Dorian Gray that you can ponder on :
Lord Henry said this to Dorian " Because to influence a person is to give him one's own soul. He does not think his natural thoughts, or burn with his natural passions. His virtues are not real to him. His sins, if there are such things as sins are borrowed (Such as example yr friend steals and you get influenced and you steal too. Or if your friend studies and you do the same ) He becomes an echo of someone else's music, an actor of a part that has not been written for him. The aim of life is self-development. To realize one's nature perfectly- that is what each of us is here for. People are afraid of themselves, nowadays. They have forgotten the highest of all dutie, the duty that one owes to one's self. Of course they are charitable. They feed the hungry , and clothe the beggar. But their own souls starve, and are naked. Courage has goneout of our race. Perhaps we never really had it. The terror of society, which is the basis of morals, the terror of God, which is the secret of religion- there are the two things that govern us ".

We do things to blend in with the crowd. Be it with emo boys who play guitars to show how different they are or a bimbo who secretly is a lesbian but chooses not to acknowledge it.
The terror of society not accepting you makes you want to be the same and not too different and weird.
The terror of God, makes you believe that Christ is real so that you'll go to heaven.
( I'm not saying everyone feels the same way ).
You do charity just to be placed under the "good books" if there are even such books.
Just to make yourself look good or feel better, that you've helped someone else, so that society will accept you. Because the morals in society are such, you've to conform to it. And if you don't you're being looked down upon.
If you take your clothes off in front of the camera, if you loose your virginity when you're 12, if you eat your artmpit hair (hahaha ) you're being frowned upon.

So really, who is the real you?

12:10 AM

I lived till(:

Tuesday, July 18, 2006
Ooh I didn't blog yesterday.
Anyway, had help for art yesterday, got irritated.
Watched television.

Today we sorta insulted the SS teacher by accident or may be not by accident.
Had lunch with C at cartel, talked.
cabbed it home.
Slept, disturbed some people through sms.
That's about it.
I hate afternoon naps in a way, they leave me.. confused and frustrated.

Part of me wants to get over and done with and part of me doesnt.
Hello art, you're my frienddddd. :D

7:34 PM

I lived till(:

Sunday, July 16, 2006
What can I say.. I AM PIERCED!
Hahaha, I used to have 7 ear holes and then they sorta closed until there's only 3 left.
And now I've got the extreme left side of my lip pierced.
I felt pretty stonned once Ann and Eme left.
So waited for Akiras call.
Left my house and waited for him for half an hour.
Left for Baldwin's place.
Sat around for a bit, till the thing got sterilized and they've smoked finish.
Got my lip pierced.
It only hurt for 3 seconds? And the pain actually does feel good.
Because it has been sometime that I've actually done a piercing and feel some metal shit being poked through my skin.
He said that I'll look minah because it's only one side, so I'll probably do the other side another day?
Yeah and I wanted to pierce my tits and he even suggested it cause there was not enough change.
But guess I'm not too man enough. Hur!
Or rather my boobs were having a bad-boob day.
His art is really good.
Anyway, walked home.

:D thanks Akira.

The piercing actually made me 10 times happier from the very stonned and pissed off me just now.
I hate sundays.
Now.. time to face my parents on saturday.
And Bird has just pointed out to me that both me and Ann are gonna wear plasters to school tomorrow and that we're bot sitting next to each other. Oh goodness?!

11:21 PM

I've very frigging tired and frustrated because once again I can't get my lip done.
I feel irritated.

Anyway, Muriz left my place at around 9 plus am.
Akira slept all the way to fucking 1 pm until I had to go out, then he had to leave.
:D I placed Patrick in front of his face.
Anyway, had lunch with my sister, Mark, C, Brother and Al.
It was fun, even though the food costed alot of money and I puked all of it out in the end.
It was fucking oily.
I was pissed off once again, because my brother walked the wrong direction and after telling us all the directions she said it was at Riverside Point, and I knew where that was.
Had fun anyway.
Went home.
Painted, T came over to watch tv.
Now Eme and Ann are at my place.

By the way, can someone tell me what's the difference between a crush, a liking and love?
Please don't give stupid answers like "oh crush is when you like someone for a short period of time "
And technically I can't really judge that now because I'm either having a crush on someone or may be something else.

Oh, smoke.

7:42 PM

Akira and Muriz are currently at my place and it's 3:23am.

I didn't go for pathlight in the end, was too tired.
I really should have went and Ann wore a mask to cover up her piercing.
Spent the whole day doing art, what can I say.. I just feel very accomplished and proud that I'm so disciplined.
I thought I was about to spend my night alone, turns out T asked me out.
She's such a motherfucker, she knows and everyone knows how much I detest buses but since I'm going onto one with her, it'll be fun.
Long bus rides with good autistic friends such as herself can be really fun.
She rushed into bus 58 saying that it'll get to paya lebar station.
But then the bus turned into some weird place, turns out the mrt station was pasir ris.
Once we knew that, we got down at bedok north secondary school and took a cab.
Only to be caught in a jam.
I had to pay 12 bucks because I owed her 5 bucks.
LOL the cab ride was.. uhh interesting.
Went for bay beats, met Stacy Muriz and Jh and co.
Ate there and after 45 minutes we left.
Then took another bus back home.
My goodness, we have spent 2 hours travelling and 45 minutes at our destination and half my cash was spent on travelling.

Went out with M and Akira to Grapevine.
Saw Valgal and Anna banana.
Had supper and they came over at 1 plus in the morn.
They're still here lazing around.
Okay I gotta go, Muriz wants to use the computer.

Resist, you are stronger than this.

3:26 AM